Yeah Yeah I know. Thank You It’s Time To Move On was to be my last post. But something happened. This very irritating voice is at me non stop.
Let me explain.
It started after finishing my last post. I thought I had put aside my pen for good for this particular blog and was excited about starting a new project. That little voice was very quick to remind me that I indeed had not fulfilled my commitment as I had promised to write 52 posts. I was up to 47 when I decided to pull the plug.
Ok, I could live with that. I was only 5 posts short, who really cares any way?
“But you didn’t keep your promise, you said you would write 52 posts. You are five short.” the voice says.
I have learned to ignore it over the years. Yes this voice has been with me since I was able to think. It has been a constant companion.
It always starts out with seemingly innocent small statements. Nothing profound and mostly sensible. If ignored it comes back with just a little more force but hardly ever digresses from its original message.
I chose to ignore it this time as I had already justified my decision to stop writing for this blog. After all, my new project was way more important and I wanted to put as much time and effort I was afforded, as time and energy right now are at a premium with me.
But this voice has a way of interfering. If it thinks its important enough it stay at me until I do something about it. Man, it can be dictatorial to the max sometimes.
Now I must explain that every time I hear this voice it’s not always necessarily for my good because over the years this voice has actually told me to do things that got me into hot water.
So there may be an argument that I would be able to recognize when the voice is telling me something for my good or that is not in my best interest. Of course I have learned to discern this voices’ intentions over the years only because I have drawn the line myself of what I think is good or bad for me.
I have learned that it is up to me to separate the good from the bad and in my case that is not always easy as the voice never changes it accent, always in English and to put it into perspective its the only voice I actually hear internally.
I should have been a lawyer because when the voice tells me something I should do and for whatever reason I refuse its authority I can make a pretty good case for better or for worse but some times that voice becomes relentless if its something It feels just needs to be done.
I ran out of excuses as to why I didn’t need to write any more posts but it stayed at me. I had a choice to make. Ride out the storm, let the voice fade after a time, dig my heals in and stand my ground or just give in and do what it has been telling me I should do.
Today I have finally given in and made the decision to finish my 52 posts. Yes this one counts and will put me up to 48.
Yes, the voice will stop bugging me on this issue but will very closely monitor my behaviour until the task at hand is complete.
Will I feel better when I complete this task? Absolutely. Not only will I feel better but I will also thank the voice for staying at me and not giving up.
No, the voice will not go away. It may take a break, give me a breather but as I have mentioned above before, it has been with me since the beginning of my time and will continue to irritate me.
Same voice different message.